Tuesday, July 1, 2008


I have horrible taste in men and I am aware of this. Come along on a journey with me to showcase my current celeb crushes while I ramble about them in little blurbs. I am so gay.

David Beckham is so handsome. He is everything I could want in a man, sans deep manly vocal capabilities. Tall, fancy looking, shaved head and lots of tattoos. The only thing that really gets me is that when he has hair, he has some stupid mohawk or a variation of. Please, Becks. just keep your head shaved. You are so much more hunkier that way. I would.

Ah, James Bond aka Daniel Craig. You are most definitely old enough to be my dad, but god damn if you aren't a dilf. I would definitely let you fall in love with me. You know you're handsome.

Channing Tatum. You're gay and can dance well. But you're really good looking and that sucks. Another thing that sucks is that you do horrible movies. Plz ungay yourself. Thanks you.

Sean Avery. You were my fave rave on the LA Kings but you've betrayed me and gone onto a NY sports team. Now, I don't like NY sports teams, never have. But for you, I will like any team. You are strapping. And you pick fights for no reason. And you have a cute facial scar that adds so much character to your freckley face. Thank you for being you, Puppy.

Henry Rollins. You too are old enough to be my dad. But I would let you talk down to me for reading Harry Potter. I don't even read Harry Potter but I would tell you I did anyway. You are a hulkomatic and I like that. Smack me around a little. It's good for me.

Would most definitely party hard with Andrew WK. I would wear white pants and punch myself in the face with AWK. He is the party, and so am I. Rain or shine, we will party together. Peep that smile...who would have ever through that AWK would get on a girl's babe list? He's the odd man out.

I don't wanna catch you in the chinchilla all through the winter, man. But make my whistle blow. Juelz Santana is definitely what my game's been missin'. Just sayin'.


Anonymous said...

i fully co-sign andrew wk.

JoeHardcore said...

This post blew my mind.