brooke and i are leaving warped tour 2006 at the Ventura country fairgrounds. we stayed and hung out at the after party, so we had had a few drinks. i don't really know who let us leave, but someone did. we're walking back to my car, and Brooke lets me know she has to shit.
"well, can you wait til we get home?"
"no i have to fucking go now."
"where are you gonna shit?"
"right here...on this fucking rock!"
"what are you gonna wipe your ass with?"
"THIS LEAF!"
you know that shitty shrubbery thats outside like, doctors offices and malls? the really succulent leaf bushes. yeah, she wiped her ass with one of those leaves.
i don't remember getting home that night. all i know is that we got home, and nothing that stupid will ever happen again.
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